The Pensive Pilgrim

I count myself fortunate that I have reached the age of fifty-nine having had very few significant health problems or regular aches and pains.  When my body does develop a fault, therefore, it comes as something of a shock, and despite ministering to - and (I hope) empathising with - people of various ages who have conditions that are often serious, debilitating and life-threatening, I realise just how much I take my own good health for granted. This was the case when, about ten years ago, I had kidney stones and was shaken and appalled by the level of pain I experienced. It has also been the case over the last few weeks as I have found myself  struggling with what I initially self-diagnosed as an attack of Sciatica. 'Dr Google' confirmed that the nature and location of the pain down my left leg was typical of the condition. Had I bothered to read a little further, I would also have learned that other lower back problems can mimic the symptoms of Sciatica and that sciatic p...

"I don't really believe in the supernatural."   So said a priest friend of mine recently. I was somewhat taken aback. He is, after all, a man of great faith who passionately believes in God. The Oxford English Dictionary defines the word supernatural as that which is ".....beyond scientific understanding or the laws of nature".  Surely this is true of God? Indeed one might well ask what would be the point of God if he weren't supernatural? My friend is in fact a devout Anglo-Catholic; he therefore believes at the very least  that when he recites the eucharistic prayer, invoking the Holy Spirit at the Lesser Epiclesis and repeating Our Lord's words of institution ("This is my body which is given for you; this is my blood.....which is shed for you") Christ becomes especially present in the bread and wine - or more - that their very substance is mystically transformed. My friend also believes that this consecration of the elements happens b...

Today I celebrate thirty-one years as a priest in God's Church. When I set off down the path to ordination, I foolishly made a number of assumptions - principally that I had a working lifetime of parish ministry ahead of me.  But this wasn't to be. After serving two Curacies - the first of which was a profoundly unhappy and dispiriting experience,  the second of which was a real joy - I faced a major crisis of conscience. It was 1990, and following Tony Higton's notorious Private Member's motion to General Synod in 1987, the Church of England was winding itself up about human sexuality. Having struggled for years with the realisation that I was gay - and having survived well-meaning but misguided attempts to 'pray the gay away' - I had eventually been convinced by a number of sympathetic clergy (some gay themselves, others not) that my sexuality was totally compatible with being a priest, and that I basically had two options - either to be celibate, or to ...

"A Charismatic and a Contemplative were walking down the road...……" So how was I now to pray? I had been profoundly influenced in my late teenage years by a group of Evangelical Charismatics. From them I had learnt the art of relaxed, conversational, extemporary prayer, and having been 'baptised in the Holy Spirit' I also sometimes prayed in tongues. But this had now all ended. I had 'walked away' from this style of Christianity - and thus from this approach to prayer - having been disturbed by what I saw as its dangerous excesses, including a rather glib and irresponsible - even abusive - approach to healing, an obsessive and disabling interest in evil and 'spiritual warfare' and a very intolerant fundamentalist theology. In hindsight I realise that these bad experiences (which I know are far from unique) stemmed from poor and misguided leadership in the particular groups with which I was involved, but I guess the instinctive auto-response of ...

This week, the Revd Rico Tice - a Minister for evangelism at All Souls Church, Langham Place, London - resigned his position on the Archbishop of Canterbury's Taskforce for Evangelism. He did so because he objects to the views of another member of that group - The Rt Revd Paul Bayes, Bishop of Liverpool - who is supportive of LGBT+ Christians  and who has expressed - albeit rather cautiously - support for equal marriage. Tice claims that he and Bishop Bayes have different religions. This is quite different from suggesting that they have a contrasting understanding of the same religion, and he is quite right. Bishop Bayes is a Christian who appears to live by the principles taught and demonstrated by Jesus in the Gospels. Jesus spent a great deal of his time reaching out to, and mixing with, those whom the 'respectable' religious leaders of his time (the Scribes and Pharisees) saw as beyond the pale. The latter were scandalise...

Like most people, I dislike labels. Labels - certainly those that are attached to people - are often dangerous because they objectify those to whom they are attached; they are also often inadequate and misleading because their brevity plays to our soundbite culture and fails to recognise the nuances of individuality.  It's not surprising, therefore, that many younger people are now resisting simplistic labelling in terms of their gender or sexual identity. On the other hand, in certain situations, labels can be helpful pointers. This has certainly been true, I think, in the Church of England where, traditionally, labels such as 'Anglo-Catholic', 'Evangelical', 'Charismatic' and 'Liberal' have been effective pointers to the style of worship and the brand of theology to which either an individual or a congregation subscribes.  But the concept of  'Churchmanship' (the collective term used to describe these labels) is, like many of its secula...

"Am I cheating?" I asked myself. I don't think anyone - even amongst our congregation - would dispute the fact that our church was in need of renewal. The congregation was small, predominantly elderly, tired and disillusioned. Worship - despite having all the outward trappings of Catholicism - felt at best very routine and at worst positively dreary, with minimal congregational participation or engagement.  There was little energy for - still less interest in - any kind of mission or evangelism. Some key roles in the parish - Churchwarden, Treasurer and PCC Secretary - had been vacant for some time. Having lived off reserves and resisted all efforts  at funding campaigns,  the parish finances were becoming dire. Whilst new people occasionally ventured into the church, they seldom stayed for long. It was a bleak and depressing picture. Had I not been literally swept along by the Holy Spirit into a personal experience of renewal, I doubt I would have stuck around for lo...